Ta Da!!!! Cleavage!!!!

So today was the unveiling of my chest and I have to say, it looks, if I do say so myself, quite beautiful. I don't know what I was expecting, more blood and redness maybe? But the incision are exactly the same place they were before, there is obviously some yellow bruising on my breast bone in the center, but yes! We have little bumps of cleavage. I already feel pretty, as silly as that sounds. I didn't dose a full day on my pain meds just half, but was dosed during church this morning which was weird. And - drum roll please? I took a shower this evening. AAAahhhhhh. Lovely. I feel good, really good, and just know this is right. I guess I always knew that my gut told me to go through with the reconstruction, but I have to say, today? I'm sooooo happy that I did. What a huge difference. (and huger as soon as the fills start)

It's funny, I have had so much going on, if people that I occasionally run into haven't read my blog, I'm finding that I have a lot of explaining to do, or catching them up actually. I tell people I had more surgery and they are all "oh, I'm sorry" then I'm all " NO! It's my reconstruction! I'm getting my boobies back!" which then creates this new layer of awkwardness if it's a man I'm talking to - but oh well. Then the news of my new meds and that creates this layer of pity which I just want to kick to the curb. I'm fine - it's working. I know when I say this however, I can feel people retreat into this 'that's just what she has to tell herself' kind of attitude. Well, no one knows what this feels like except me - and I have to say, I've never been more sure of anything in my life. It's exhilarating. I'm the happiest I've ever been ironically.

My wonderful hubby is sleeping on the couch, and I am slowly fading (thank you percocet) but need to close with a sentiment from Pastor George's message this morning. He said when there is love, there is no room for fear. It is impossible to feel both at the same time. That is exactly what I have been feeling for weeks now - consistently - love. Thanks Be To God. I'll post some pics this week of my cleavage bumps, it is truly amazing. I would have done it tonight, but my PJ is too cute sleeping right now. ;-)

God Bless and have a great week -