Me - Just better.....

So - this experience has been nothing but good from the looney point forward. I kinda learned who to stay away from, and then I just let myself go and experience these tools they have introduced and I have to say - this is some pretty cool sh*t. I know a lot of people have a lot of different opinions about this course I'm taking, so for the record, here's how I look at it:

I believe that God designed this world, it in many facets and intrical parts, with such intention - that even the cures to illnesses are all contained within its creation - we just have to find them. (if this sounds a lot like The Shack, its because it is). When God gave us free will, he designed us each with as much intensity and intricity as he did the rest of the world and all its creation. We decide how far we want to go to investigate this free will, and unleash all of its power placed by God within each of us. That's what I believe. (whew! I need a glass of wine after typing that)

That being said, I'm pretty amazed at what I am able to create. I think I always went through life reacting to all that happened to me. Maybe occasionally deciding I wasn't going to react a certain way, or allow another person to upset me, or something like that. But to learn I have the ability to do this every day - for always? Pretty cool.

I'm feeling really strong physically, a little tired as my brain doesn't seem to want to stop when my head hits the pillow, but strong. My onc is having me only take my pills for 4 days then she will check my blood counts, just to make sure I'm ready for my surgery. My counts were great when I took the full weeks dose before, so this won't be an issue. She is just playing it safe. Funny, I WANT to take the full dose, I WANT to take these pills as much as I possibly can, but I understand. I've also started taking the nausea pill an hour before the chemo pills, and that is helping a bunch.

I miss my husband and girls so much it hurts. I hear Ginger is now saying 'bless you' when you sneeze. How adorable. And Madeline got some 'resurrection eggs' from school she is going to explain to me. PJ said he thought they were going to be like 'freedom fries', like we weren't supposed to call them 'Easter eggs' but it was something totally different. So funny. I feel bad for missing these things as they happened, but then I know what I am accomplishing here is amazing stuff. Truly amazing. I will finish tomorrow, probably early as I seem to be ahead of everyone else (over achiever). Wish I could pop into a church for services tomorrow but the only ones around me are ginormous Catholic churches, which, even if I wanted to go to a catholic service I didn't bring proper attire to attend such a service. Looked for a Methodist church but none are walking distance. I hear a huge dog barking right now - from inside the hotel - is that normal? Hmmm.

Well, tired, must sleep. I'm going to bed and want to wish everyone a Happy Easter. I randomly (or not) turned to the following passage in my bible this evening, thought it was appropriate to share:

Ephesians 5:1-2
Imitate God, therefore, in everything you do, because you are his dear children. Live a life filled with love following the example of Christ. He loved us and offered himself as a sacrifice for us, a pleasing aroma to God.

God Bless -