Yes, it is true. Seems my cancer is back, although very tiny this time, on my liver. Let's get the medical/technical crap out of the way first - my oncologist has recommended I go on a different drug in lieu of the Femara - I am starting a pill form of chemotherapy tomorrow. I will no longer be on an 'estrogen blocker' type of drug, since it doesn't seem to be doing what we had hoped. The options were go back on the weekly chemo I had before, or this pill form. She has recommended the pill form since I responded so well to chemotherapy before. This pill just obviously gives me a much better quality of life than the other. I will take 4 pills each morning and 4 pills each evening for a week, then take a week off - and so on. If it works, then I will be on this for a 'very long time'. We will schedule a CT scan in 2 months to see how its working.
On an emotional level of course I'm sad, scared - all those normal things I felt before, just on a more familiar level. I I'm really super happy that I elected for the 3 month scans - otherwise we would be faced with a possibly much different scenario. I can't help but feel like my young body just wants to have this estrogen coming from somewhere - like it's fighting to be a part of me from my adrenal gland. So, we need to bring out the bigger guns to fight it. I'm ready, of course I'm ready. I'm listening to this news today w/ PJ with my oncologist on speaker phone while feeding my girls lunch - trust me - I'm ready for this. I'm just pissed off that I have to be is all. I'm tired of these 'bumps' in the road. Maybe this is the journey though - once a cancer patient, always a cancer patient. This is my journey, and this is where we're headed now - whether I like it or not.
I must sign off now, going to get my hair done. And I am going all blond now - I figure I have at least 2 months to keep it and will enjoy it while I can. It's just hair.
I will write more later once this continues to process for me.
God Bless -
God Bless
DINA'S BOOB BLOG - An online journal of my breast cancer experience.
I will pray for you.
ReplyDeleteYou are a super star and will continue to be the hoosey whatsits out of this little 'c'... You're just not the eulogy type. You're the type that revolutionizes new methods of thinking and lives a large dash and when you look back on your life in 50, 60 years, you'll be one of those ladies who gets to say you did it all, fighting cancer included. You've got a lot of living left and much more child raising and teaching to do. I see you taking another round of different junk to fight this little stink and continue to perfume the air with all that is Dina. Love your positivism. Love your blogs. Love you. Keep going, mamma. <3 Sam
ReplyDeleteWe love you and are praying for you! Love, The Harrisons
ReplyDeleteCan hardly wait to see the new blonde locks! Very exciting. I will pray for every little follicle to just stay there and GROW- dang it- GROW while praying for every @#$% cancer cell to LEAVE And NEVER COME BACK- Dang it! Love you much and praying even more Big, Hairy, Audaciosu Prayers-- Pr. Mary
ReplyDeleteTake it from me, blonds do have fun, don't know how much MORE, but fun. I'll bet you are a hot blond! Blonds get the looks, trust me, even an old girl like me. You keep that spirit of yours up. So glad P.J. is home, too. I was concerned about you being alone, processing all this. Hubby makes things better every time! God is good and he will never leave you~ Love and prayers, Sheila Adams
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