Fighting The Fight!!!

My body is just fighting something off with sheer force, I can feel it. I haven't felt real great since we got here. Well, I've felt more yukky than not yukky if that makes any sense. And it's really been frustrating. I feel like I appear lazy - to everyone. Cuz it's just so hard to explain to anyone - even myself sometimes - how I feel. I just feel yukky. I'm sweaty, then I'm freezing - then my hands and feet are so cold, not even being under a thousand blankets can get them warm. Then I'm sweating again. Arg.

Got to see PJ's cousin and her husband today, and that was great. It was so nice to just chat with everyone and catch up - and have the conversation NOT be about cancer. That was refreshing. I do feel that I'm different now - I can't quite explain how, I'm working on formulating the words - but I can feel the changes that have occurred in me the more I am around people I haven't been around in awhile. It's not bad, but it's almost like I'm at a loss for words, where before, I never had a problem figuring out what to say. Now, part of this very well be the chemo - but lately, I feel like the things I want to say sound good in my head, but when they come out of my mouth, they sound all jumbled and stupid. Maybe I'm trying to hard. I know sometimes I try to fill someone in too much too quickly - have you ever done that? Wanted someone to understand something so badly, but then felt rushed to explain it - so it comes out all stupid and weird. That's how I feel.

We're off to Disneyland tomorrow, and I think we'll be just fine. I'm feeling a bit better tonight - just need to get a good nights sleep is all. I've been praying on that all day, since that is where it's been most challenging. I'm pretty excited to just watch Madeline's face light up. I can't wait to take tons of pictures. Thought I would share a couple here with you that were taken the last couple of days - so sweet. We really are having a lovely time. It feels so good to just be somewhere else for a change. And my girls and my husband have just continued to shower me with love, which makes feeling yukky, well, not so yukky sometimes. ;-)

God Bless -


Ginger with a tomato from Aunt Karen's Garden!!

The Mountcastles at The Rainforest Cafe!!


Dad and Madeline napping.