Love Those Berry Flavored Tums......

So it seems my fatigue has come early this treatment. This was most likely aggravated by the fact that I was up until almost 1am completing the social security stuff last night - then up taking care of 2 little ones by 6:30 - hmmmmm, genius deduction? Duh. Today I had the acid reflux pretty bad, but my sinuses haven't been too bad, we'll see what tomorrow morning brings as they usually strike on Fri mornings then seem to last all week. The humidifier in our room at night has helped immensely.

Madeline still comes and climbs in bed with me each night - I think maybe she has slept in her bed maybe, 2 nights since I started this journey? It's like she knows to be with me. Strange. She always wakes up and looks at my face and touches it lightly with her fingers, then closes her eyes again and gives a little 'mmm' sound. It is the sweetest. She is so cuddly. I'll take every moment of it. No matter how crowded our bed gets. I mean, that's why you get a king size, right? And Ginger is just content to be in her crib and sleeps through the night, has since about 8 months old. Thank you God. She now motions to rub my head, it makes her giggle to rub my fuzzy, stubbly head. It is really quite cute. When I'm wearing a scarf or something, she'll take it off of me just to rub my head.

PJ goes tomorrow for his vasectomy - and he and my dad went out tonight to have their manly time. Whatever that means. I'm so touched and blessed that my husband and my father are such good friends. It warms my heart to see that they like each other, love each other, respect each other. It is like every girls dream to see the man that she loves and her father become close. Again, I am so blessed. PJ loves spending time w/ my Dad - and I can't blame him. My daddy is a pretty good hang.

I haven't been feeling very well today, and I need to be rested up for tomorrow to take PJ to the doctor. He's getting this done in Cottonwood, so it'll be a little trek. PJ's brother and partner are coming to help me tend to the girls and PJ for the weekend since we never know how I"ll feel those first couple days after treatment. It just never seems to stay consistent, very frustrating. Like today, felt like shit today, and I usually don't feel this way until Fri - go figure.

I need to thank my friend Jennifer tonight - she and I talked a long time this evening about some anxiety I've been having, and she is just that friend that spells things out to you in a way you need them spelled out - does that make sense? She had the words tonight that really put my mind at ease, and focused me in the right direction. I am ever so thankful for Jennifer - she has been the rock that keeps me solid, and the soft place to fall when I am weak. When she prays w/ me I experience such peace and comfort - I thank God for her being in my life, and for the privilege of being her friend. We all need people in our lives that lift us up and hold us high - I remember a time, many times actually, in my life where I surrounded myself with just the opposite of people - because I thought I deserved that in some f*cked up way - I didn't realize we have choices in this life - we choose who we associate with, and choose the energy with which we surround ourselves with. I know I try to encourage those who choose to live in the negative, because I think that is all they really need to hear, consistently is encouragement and love, but I will always choose the positive path. It is so much more brightly lit!

Enough of my Tylenol PM induced babble - say goodnight Gracie -

Good night Gracie -

God Bless.